There are many reasons why someone might not buy what you’re selling.

They might not have the resources to buy it, they might have the resources but not have put in the time necessary to understand what you’re selling, they might have put in the time but still not understand it, they might understand it but arrive at a different conclusion about its value, or it might be another of the large group of buyer-related reasons. Finally, the reason for not buying might also be you, the seller.

As these examples show, there are many more buyer-related reasons for someone to not buy something than the single seller-related reason. Yet, despite this mismatch, we disproportionately turn to ourselves when someone doesn’t buy what we’re selling.┬áThe reason for this is that we default to viewing our lives as being the result of our own actions and need to make a conscious effort to realize that much of what happens is actually the result of the actions of others.

In other words, there’s a mismatch between the actual probability that the buyer isn’t buying because of you versus your perception of this probability.

Recognizing this mismatch helps you keep selling with confidence.

Also published on Medium.